When people talk about parenting they always talk about the great things about it and how wonderful it is. Don't get me wrong I absolutely love being a mom and I love my son more than anything in the world. But when his dad and I planned him I didn't expect to be sitting here alone.
I raise my son almost completely alone. Devon only helps when it's convenient for him, and he buys him diapers and whipes and what not. But that's it and I have no help from the rest of my family.
I get these moments where I don't want to be a mom or even alive. But then my son does something adorable and reminds me just how amazing he is and that I am his mother and I have to be there for him.
So every day is still a battle for me but as much as it hurts to watch Devon have a life away from us while I do everything for our son I have to be strong for him. I am though I am strong for my son but I have to learn how to be strong and take care of myself. That is the battle I'm going to be fighting for along time. Doing it alone though will be the hardest part.
So what I'm saying is you're not alone really, being a parent is rewarding your child will always love you and be there for you when you are at your lowest.
